Evolving and growing is hard work, but no one seems to highlight that. The amount of work, dedication, and discipline that it takes is not for the faint of heart. We are conditioned to believe that change happens in an instance, but that is not the case with personal growth. It is downright difficult to change a habit or change who we used to be. However, it is not impossible.
We think that if we read a few self-help books and go to therapy a few times, then we will immediately change. That is not the case. Like everything that grows and evolves, there is a painful period. No one seems to mention that period because it’s not sexy, but this is the time that we all need.
You have been growing and stretching and putting in the work. You have taken the time to self-reflect and to become more self-aware. You can feel that you are changing, but so can the people around you. During this process, you start losing those who are close to you, and that has been hurtful. You didn’t go on this journey of growth to lose people. As you evolve and grow, people may not be ready for that change and you have caught them by surprise. They are used to the old you that they have become accustomed to, and you are deviating from that person.
You will start hearing from people less and less. The excuse will be that you’ve changed. It will be painful. It will be like a punch in the gut that you were not expecting. You will feel lonely at times, but that is okay. When you start to change, you will lose people. Friends that you thought would be in your life forever start to disappear. You start wondering if this is worth it. You wonder if the betterment of yourself is worth the losses.
It will all be worth it. I promise you it will pay off in the long run. You will look back a year from now and smile at all the work that you have been able to do, and the work that you will continue to do. Commit to yourself that no matter what, you’ll do whatever it takes to be a better version of yourself. Make the commitment that you will take these steps even though it is hard. This growth will change your life for the better.